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bear with me – please

December 6, 2012 by admin 11 Comments

“Then Aslan stopped, and the children looked into the stream. And there, on the golden gravel of the bed of the stream, lay King Caspian, dead, with the water flowing over him like liquid glass. His long white beard swayed in it like water-weed. And all three stood and wept. Even the Lion wept: great Lion-tears, each tear more precious than the Earth would be if it was a single solid diamond. And Jill noticed that Eustace looked neither like a child crying, nor like a boy crying and wanting to hide it, but like a grown-up crying. At least, that is the nearest she could get to it; but really, as she said, people don’t seem to have any particular ages on that mountain.” – The Silver Chair by C.S. Lewis The Chronicles of Narnia

What does it mean to cry like a grown-up? 

That is the question at the end of the quote, in A Year with Aslan Daily Reflections from the Chronicles of Narnia.

I have never been a habitual cry-er; I am an emotional cry-er.

When I speak passionately, I choke up.

When I hear very sad news, I cry.

 

When I am touched by a sad movie, I cry.

When I am angry, sometimes I cry.

But when I lose my mother:

I. Weep. Deep. Sorrowful. Wet. Racking. Salty. Tears.

A lot of them.

Almost every day.

I miss her so.

Bear with me, please.

xo

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Filed Under: Heart, Home, Hope, Susan's Musin's Tagged With: Change, family, journey, life

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Lynne says

    December 6, 2012 at 11:10 am

    Praying that you will experience the gift of His comfort each day, knowing that your tears are precious to Him.

    Reply
  2. Kathy says

    December 6, 2012 at 12:04 pm

    I love you so, Susan.

    It’s a road you must “walk out” on your own…well, not exactly on your own….of course….JESUS is with you. He knows your grief and your heartache and how badly you miss your precious mother. He knows! And one day……ONE DAY…..

    “Weeping may endure for a night”….or a week…or a month…or longer…..”BUT JOY” …joy DOES come!

    Love you!

    Reply
  3. Helemarie says

    December 6, 2012 at 1:06 pm

    Oh Susan, The tears didn’t stop, the walks we must walk. No they aren’t easy, but w/ our Lord Carrying us, Yes, he is Carrying you on his shoulders. Just rememeber that he is placing your tears in his bottle, and he is Loving the time w/ your mama. What a Hoot that must be. I love ya my Precious B.F.F ♥

    Reply
  4. John Mann says

    December 6, 2012 at 4:39 pm

    We love you and offer hugs as needed and shoulders too.

    Reply
  5. Joyce Aycoth says

    December 6, 2012 at 4:46 pm

    I know the hurt and pain you are going through. My mother lived with Larry and me for 32 years after my dad passed away. Over time God WILL remove the hurt and tears. You will never forget her. Praying that God will give you that sweet peace that only He can give.

    Reply
  6. Merry Geary says

    December 6, 2012 at 6:11 pm

    Trust that the Lord will get you through this time of sadness. Look at the photo’s, so many memories, have that cry then SMILE and tell Mom you will see her one day. Hugs, Merry

    Reply
  7. Peggy Hoefl says

    December 7, 2012 at 2:53 am

    Me too Sue. I miss her desperately. Even though we sometimes had to tell her like it was and I complained about her, I weep big tears for her. I miss her daily. I want to push “2” on my cell phone and hear her say “Oh, Hi Peg.” I will say this this whole experience has made heaven so so real for me. I “see” her there and know that there is really is a “put your feet on the ground” place called heaven. MISS YOU Mom!

    Reply
  8. Carol Knipschield says

    December 7, 2012 at 4:25 am

    My hugs a prayers are going up for you both. I know you know they are but I will keep telling you until you feel better. Love you both.

    Reply
  9. ali battersby says

    December 7, 2012 at 6:44 pm

    Sue
    We did not know until this moment, of your loss. We can only extend our deepest sympathy to you and your family. Please know that we reach out to you thru the miles with love and prayers.
    We hope to see you when we are up for
    Christmas (Dec 20-30th) if you are there,
    May God envelope you with his loving consolation,
    Ali and Gary

    Reply
  10. margie says

    December 9, 2012 at 9:52 am

    A wonderful man whom also was my pastor so many years ago, said to me, “Margie, the first of everything is the hardest.” He was right and I found it gets, for a lack of a better word, softer as the years pass, but your loved one is never forgotten. And the tears… they still come as sure as a new day dawns, but it changes in a way that only I can describe as a way ‘Jesus orchestrates it’. My blessings are many for you Susan for so many reasons. But the one that stands out the most is because of the love I have for you and your family♥

    Reply
  11. cher says

    December 30, 2012 at 1:37 pm

    I cry for your broken heart….love you sweet angel girl

    Reply

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